Balaam's Donkey
Balaam’s Donkey
Number’s 22: 21-40
“Who is this Balaam guy and why should I give a hoot? And while we’re talking here, what’s up with the talking donkey?”
Who was Balaam? He was a “soothsayer.” I know that this conjures up images of a woman with a turban on her head with a crystal ball sitting on a table in front of her. That’s the wrong way to think about Balaam. Think instead about the army of people on television these days who are making predictions about the future of the stock market. Consider the people in every business whose job it is to act as if they know something that they really can’t know (what exactly this data means; how exactly this product will do; how exactly this new hire will perform.). A whole lot of people make a living acting as if they know what’s going to happen next. Some of even convince themselves.
Life is full of surprises and twists and turns. Sometimes, we human’s embrace those surprises and unknown next steps as “fun” and “spontaneous.” Sometimes we’re afraid and we just wait for that “freight train” to come barreling down on us. Sometimes, we hire people to pretend that they know what no one can know.
In the ancient world, these people were prophets for hire. The, real prophets were prophets because they were doing and saying what God wanted them to do and say. They didn’t know what was next or know what to say. They certainly couldn’t be bought. Instead, relied on God. Then, there were the prophets for hire.
The Moabites, the sworn enemies of Israel, were looking to hire a “prophet.” They wanted him to predict that the stock market was going to bottom out on Tuesday—No! They wanted him to predict that “Ugg” boots were going to be next big thing—No! The Moabites wanted him to predict that they were going to defeat the forces of Israel, forces who just happened to be lining up for battle at that very moment. What nation doesn’t realize that controlling public opinion can be a game changer, emboldening your side and discouraging your enemies?
Not surprisingly to those who knew him, Balaam’s integrity just happened to be for sale. He wasn’t an Israelite or a Moabite. He just wanted to make a buck or two. He was more than happy to offer a curse or a blessing. So, when Balak, the king of Moab, sent his nobleman to fetch Balaam, our man was ready to go. It was time to get paid. Balaam saddled up his donkey and hit the road.
At this point, I remember a story a friend told me about a moment when he was riding in a limousine with the President of the United States. (This was quite a few presidents ago.) As they were riding, the President kept wincing, over and over again. My friend thought, “My God, the President is having stroke or a heart attack!” Then, the wincing stopped. A few minutes later, at the groundbreaking ceremony he was there to attend, the President took the ceremonial shovel and winced as it hit the ground. The President of the United States had been practicing for the show! I think Balaam was getting ready for the show, only on his donkey, not in a stretch limo with the Presidential seal on the side.
While Balaam is lost in his thoughts, something actually happens. Balaam never even sees it coming which is pretty funny for someone who, presumably can “see” the future. Suddenly, Balaam’s donkey veers wildly to the right. Balaam and his donkey end up in a ditch. Balaam beats his donkey again.
(I’d just like to point out that we’ve all been Balaam. When we’ve forgotten to fill the gas tank or failed to maintain our car what’s our response? Blame the car! Who takes responsibility any more? Most of us prefer “angry” to “bewildered,” or “humbled” or “responsible” hands down.)
There was a reason why they ended up in the ditch. We know this from the start. We are told that the donkey veers off the path because it can see something that Balaam can’t see, namely a very large angel from God who happens to be wielding a very large sword. (Now, I know the whole “angel” thing is a challenge, but bear with me.) The donkey sees the mortal danger ahead of them and saves Balaam. His reward? Balaam beats it and yells at it!
At this point, we can start to identify not only with Balaam—the man on a mission to make a buck, doing something he may not really be able to do—but also with the donkey, —the creature who saw something that others couldn’t see, especially the others who were relying on him, who took a beating for correcting the course. The donkey is just doing what had to be done. However, in the eyes of the world, or at least in Balaam’s eyes, this donkey was a bad, bad donkey. And haven’t we all been a bad donkey a time or two?
If we’re honest, there’s a little bit of a donkey in us all. (Or to put the matter differently, we all can be a bit of a jackass.) We are stubborn and opinionated. We can be pretty resistant when others try to control us. Sometimes those parts of us aren’t just a problem. Sometimes those parts turn out to be our strength. That tough outer layer of donkey hide that we’ve grown over the years comes in handy when it’s our turn to take a beating or two for doing the right thing.
So, in the words of one of my favorite movies, “What we have here is a failure to communicate.” Granted, Balaam and the donkey were used to communicating through a quick kick in the ribs here and a not-so-subtle “BLEET” there. None of that was going to cover the phrase, “Are you really going to tell me that you don’t see that angry angel with the large sword standing right there?”
We’re stuck. On the one hand, we have Balaam who is full of self-doubt and worry and anxiety, getting ready for his big payday and he just wants one darn thing to go right. On the other hand, we have a four-legged beast of burden who seemingly has lost not only his mind but his willingness to be controlled or even cooperate.
Balaam, simply by virtue of being a human being, does what we do so often when things are stuck: “Let’s just force this to work!” Brilliant! I’ve personally left behind a trail of broken things and a few relationships that I was sure would work if I just pushed a little harder! When we don’t get what we want, when things don’t go the way we want them to, when we are stuck, we try harder than ever to control things. How dare the world not conform to my desires?
The truth is that the “donkeys” of this world don’t care about your control issues. Donkeys just keep on resisting. Balaam hops back on his donkey. However, there’s still a big, nasty angel with a sword ahead. Now, though, the path gets even narrower. This time, the donkey rams Balaam into a fence. He gets an “owee” on his ankle. Once again, Balaam beats the donkey.
Pause for a minute…what’s happened is not nearly the worst thing that could happen. Balaam hasn’t been sliced and diced by that nasty angel. All Balaam can see, though, is that he’s stuck with a poor excuse for a donkey and now his ankle hurts. He could have stopped and asked, “What’s really going on here?” But that’s not who Balaam is, not when he’s the one having a bad day and he’s looking to lay a little blame out there in the world.
No…on this day, Balaam is totally committed to the control game. If things feel like they are spinning out of control, the thing to do is to become even more controlling. Do not pause to think! Do not ask any questions! Just throw the full weight and force of your will power at the world! After all, real power involves coercing whoever or whatever is in my way, right? Real power is about making the world conform to my plans!
In a blind rage, Balaam hops back on the donkey. This time, though, the path becomes even narrower. The path is barely a donkey’s width and there are walls on either side. Still, that nasty angel is right there in the middle of the road. There’s nowhere to go. So, the donkey does what any problem solving donkey would do: it sits down.
At this point, Balaam fully surrenders to road rage. He grabs a stick and starts beating his donkey. (Haven’t we all seen the guy on the side of the road whose car is broken down, who’s response is…to kick the car?). Balaam sputters. He spits. He sweats. He makes a total jackass of himself—which is what happens when we are out to control things and the world just will not cooperate.
At this point, God intervenes. God “smites” Balaam, right? Nope! God says, “Sorry about the nasty angel,” right? Nope! Instead, God gives the donkey a voice…which is amazing!
Jump with me for a second. Think of Jesus’ ministry…a lot of what he does is give the people in this world who tend to get treated as if they are less than human the chance to have a voice: the bent over woman, the leper, the foreigner. Again and again, Jesus listens to the people whom no one else even sees. Healing begins in the moment when they speak up and someone actually listens. In our story, God says to the donkey, “Speak!”
Of course, Balaam had a voice the whole time, but he didn’t want to have a discussion. He wasn’t going to ask a donkey a question, like, oh…I don’t know…”What do you see?” He just wants the darn donkey to do what he wants it to do. This is all any self-respecting bossy and controlling person ever wants: “Just do what I tell you to do and we’ll be good!” Bossy, controlling people are used to being in charge. They don’t discuss anything with anyone. So, imagine their surprise one day when the donkey finally speaks up!
Having been given a voice, the donkey uses it brilliantly. In my favorite translation of this text, the donkey first looks Balaam in the eye and says, “What did I ever do to you? Why are you so angry at me?” Now, there’s a discussion starter! Balaam responds, in essence, “Well, three different times, you didn’t do what I told you to do! How dare you?” At which point, the talking donkey asks the most important question of all: “Am I not your donkey?” In an instant, control and coercion give way to relationship: “Haven’t I always been your loyal donkey? You know me. Can we talk?”
We’ve all been jackasses like Balaam, right, hoping for total control and refusing to “use our words?” We’ve all felt voice-less like that donkey and taken a few blows. Then, the necessary words are spoken: “Am I not your loving wife, your beloved child, your life-long friend, your trusted ally? Am I not the person who most of the time does come through? Did it ever occur to you that I might have a good reason for what I’m doing, that I’m not just trying to make you nuts, that I might see something you don’t see?
Balaam makes amends with his donkey (and they commit to working on this whole communication issue!). Balaam also makes amends with God, vowing to only speak the words that God wants him to speak to the Moabites which is altogether likely going to cost him a paycheck. He may be a bit of a jackass but from now on, he will remember who is in charge. From now on, he will use his words and do his best to speak God’s word and maybe even allow for the possibility that others might actually see something that he cannot see.